The brilliant idea came from our very smart friend and capable mom, Becky, which resulted in our very own, rotating "only" children playgroup.
We moms, unfamiliar with the act of caring for multiple children (4 to 5 in this case), were naive in only the way high achieving, older, working parents can be. We believed that if we simply applied order and control to our environments - if we had a Plan - then the children would follow suite.
In my work history, I had been responsible for the productive output of more than 120 employees across 9 states. This hardly compared to the achievements of other parents in the group - scientists, consultants, IT managers, etc. - however, my point being, I never thought I wouldn't be able to handle five people under the age of 5 when I had managed so many.
We all seemed to share an unspoken belief that if we parents planned and served the group well, then the output would follow. If we organized activities in well placed stations with lovely kid colors, placed snacks just so, and delivered our most 1950s mom-like smile, with the metaphorical white ruffle apron tied around our waste, these little children would behave like children in a Norman Rockwell painting (who were after all static paint on paper)
A morning of frenetic organizing, placing toys, activities and snacks just so; a deep breath in and large smile out as the front door opened to let in the first of 5 small children, marked the beginning of my first Sunday morning.
However, unaware of my preparations and expectations, and not yet briefed as to how my image of the day would proceed, this child made her jubilant entry into the living room, soon to be joined by a whole group of small ones, and the fact was, they had it in for me.
Or at least, that was how my soon-to-be discombobulated mental state would tell me not long after this first child walked through the door.
However, unaware of my preparations and expectations, and not yet briefed as to how my image of the day would proceed, this child made her jubilant entry into the living room, soon to be joined by a whole group of small ones, and the fact was, they had it in for me.
Or at least, that was how my soon-to-be discombobulated mental state would tell me not long after this first child walked through the door.
This group of little rock stars took my home and heart as only rock and rollers can. They knew the time was for them. Urgent demands for juice, time on the swing, a toy that although normally ignored would take on life blood importance if in the hands of another only child; "I have to go potty...NOW!" would be sporadically hollered from across the room.
In my swiveling frenzy to make these children content, I quickly realized that no level of organization, planning or charm would keep me from spiraling into complete helter skelter; no amount of servitude would keep the juice from spilling on my white couch; keep the children from jumping on the furniture, nor stop the death cry when a toy was touched by another.
My head spun like an owl on speed trying to accommodate each and every demand from these bottomless pits of want and need.
After what seemed liked months, but was actually only 2 hours, I discovered myself lying face down on the bedroom floor with what seemed like hundreds, but was actually only 5 children climbing on my back, legs and head laughing as they jumped with all their 35 pounds of weight (it's impressive what one can do with 35 pounds). Toys, clothes, food and other random household stuff efficiently strewn across the house.
My cat was nowhere to be found, having made a quick exit with the arrival of only child #1. I felt myself wishing I were a cat.
And then when I thought I could take no more of the fighting, the demands, the needs, suddenly we hit our stride.
As though waking from a coma, I found myself peacefully sitting on the couch reading out loud the storybook, Go Dog Go. Children sat quietly to my right and to my left; one quietly pushed a blue batman car on the rug. Snuggled under each arm were what seemed angels of love, gazing up occasionally to ask Why. Somehow, all the toys and food had been picked up and put away; the house free of clutter, the picture of order.
I felt a lurch of sadness when the first knock came from parent #1 to take respective child home. I loved this child. I marveled at this particular child's uniqueness, funny personality and huge eyes. I felt pure gratitude for having been the one to provide this child juice when thirsty, food when hungry and a hug when needed.
Somehow and despite it all, I couldn't wait for my next Sunday rock star play group.
